Nearly 5 years ago, my husband’s precious maternal grandmother passed away. This special woman had an amazing sense of humor and a flair for life. Without saying a word, she could make me laugh with just a look. Several years before her death, she visited a local funeral home in order to plan her funeral services. When she passed away, the family didn’t have to deal with the stress of organizing her farewell services. They could relax, grieve, and concentrate on the wonderful memories they shared with her. I've grown to appreciate this. On this blog, you will discover the steps required to plan your own funeral.
Planning Your Funeral
Tips For Helping Mourners As They Plan A Cremation Service
Nora Mitchelle
When people are mourning the loss of a loved one, they may not always be thinking clearly. It can be one of the most painful things they ever experienced, and they may need help with the cremation service. However, it's not always easy for bereaved people to ask for help. Follow these tips to help mourners plan and hold the cremation service they want for the lost loved one.
Tip: Find Out the Rules and Laws of Areas Where They Want to Hold the Service
Cremation services are often held in public areas. Because many people express an interest in being buried at sea or in the mountains, it can be tricky to get access to these ideal places for the cremation service. Take a load off the mourners' minds by checking on the rules for them. You can the mourners know what their options are for holding the service.
Tip: Ask Open-Ended Questions to Allow the Mourners to Express Themselves
It's not always easy for people to decide what they want to include in a cremation service. If you notice that the mourners are struggling to make choices about the memorial service, ask a few open-ended questions to help them look at the issues at hand more deeply. When they are able to relax and talk about the matter at hand, they may be able to more easily make decisions.
The open-ended questions you may want to ask include the following.
- What are your happiest memories with your loved one?
- Why is it that this person was so special?
- Who were the loved one's personal heroes?
- How do you feel your loved one would plan your cremation service if the situation was reversed?
- What sort of music did your loved one enjoy the most?
- How do you feel the person would most want to be remembered?
- Which songs did the person love to play on repeat?
- What do you remember as being especially important hobbies of your loved one?
As the mourners talk about their loved one, they may feel a greater trust in their own knowledge and abilities to plan the cremation service.
Tip: Show Up and Offer Specific Ways to Help
Simply being there for your close friends or family members can go a long way to comforting them. While they are working on the cremation service, offer to take them somewhere on their breaks. If they need help with childcare so they can focus on planning the service, offer to watch the kids or pay for a babysitter. Instead of telling the mourners to contact you if they need anything, show up and offer to do specific things you know they need.
Finally, keep in mind that it's important to trust yourself. If you don't know the right thing to say or do, it's okay to state that. Simply being there for the mourners and trying to help them with the cremation service will likely mean a lot. It's the sort of thing that people may remember for the rest of their lives, and it's one of the kindest ways to be there for bereaved people.
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